Poppers now come in a subscription box! We repeat, POPPERS NOW COME IN A SUBSCRIPTION BOX!
No, seriously… You can now get poppers in a subscription box. The gay heavens just opened. The angels of pandemic lockdown are singing.
Launched in August of 2020, Poppr is a subscription box service that serves up poppers, and the site is fairly simple to use. “Poppr is a subscription box service fulfilling all your cleanr needs,” says it’s site.
“You choose which Popprbox best fits your wants — Basic, Bulge, or Bottom. You will then receive your Popprbox containing different selections, in the mail at the beginning of every month.”
Of course, our fellow gays took to Twitter to express their admiration and crack jokes.
The process is pretty straightforward. You can sign up for the Basic Box for $15, the Bulge Box for $25, or the Bottom Box for $45. The Basic Box subscribers get one bottle of poppers a month, the Bulge Box subscribers get two bottles a month and the Bottom Box subscribers get FOUR bottles a month. With four bottles, it seems like the Bottom Box subscribers are the luckiest. But going through four bottles of poppers seems a bit unlikely right now… Or is it?
“The pandemic seems to be a double-edged sword, in that people aren’t going out and socializing as much so perhaps don’t need poppers,” the company told Out Magazine. “But then on the other hand people are staying in, and having it delivered straight to your door is convenient!”
“Inspiration for the company came when moving bedroom furniture around,” they also told Out. “In true NYC apartment style, the floor boards bowed and dipped beneath the bed. Where, an array of old bottles had collected and fueled the idea of having them regularly delivered.”
The company’s Instagram profile appears to have been POPPING (See what I did there?) from August 2020 until about October 2020, when they began uploading images of some of the old, trusted favorites like Rush, Jungle Juice and Double Scorpio. They also told Out magazine that they plan to incorporate more “boutique brands”.
Although we all know that poppers are non-addictive inhalants that give you a little buzz or rush during sex while also relaxing anal muscles for bottoming, the laws around them cand be a little weird. Also, they can also be dangerous when mixed with certain erectile dysfunction medications.
“These products are not sold for human consumption,” the site states. “The abuse of these items with ED medication can be fatal.”