How Butch Please is Revolutionizing the Kink Scene with Doug from WRUFF Events

WRUFF Events was established in 2019 in order to bridge the gap in the leather community by providing a safe space for queer people and people of other identities to participate in the leather, kink, and fetish scene. Five years later it is thriving and steadily gaining in popularity as its cornerstone event, WRUFF Presents: Butch Please, continues its residency in Chicago while simultaneously spreading throughout the US.

We sit down with Wruff Doug, the creator of WRUFF Events, and the driving force behind Butch Please to get a better understanding of this revolutionary party that is taking the nightlife and fetish scene by storm.

Wruff Doug

BWM: Can you tell us a bit about why you launched WRUFF Presents: Butch Please?

Wruff Doug: The Butch Please party was created under our brand WRUFF (Why Resist Understanding Fetish Fun) to bridge the gap within the leather, kink, and fetish community, to foster inclusivity, education, and open communication. We wanted to challenge stereotypes, break down barriers, and amplify the voices of marginalized individuals within the bear, leather, kink, and fetish community, regardless of their race, gender identity, sexual orientation, age, or any other identifiable characteristics. We accomplished this by actively working to create a safe space for everyone.

BWM: What is your personal history with the kink/ leather scene?

Doug: I entered into the kink/leather/fetish scene when I was 18 years old learning from the “old guard,” and at 43, going on 44, I’ve noticed the leather scene has continued to evolve and diversify, encompassing a wide range of identities, practices, and communities. There’s been an inevitable evolution, the kink and leather scenes are seeing an increase in people of all genders, sexual orientations, and backgrounds, united by their interest in consensual kink, and fetish culture. I do recognize that historically the leather, kink, and fetish community has been associated with gay male culture, but it’s important to recognize that there are many communities, each with its own traditions, norms, and subcultures. These communities include not only gay men but also lesbians, bisexual, transgender, and people of all sexual orientations and gender identities.

BWM: Since we are a bear publication, what would you say the intersectionality is between the bear and kink scenes?

Doug: The intersectionality between the bear and kink scenes can vary depending on the specific communities and individuals involved. However, there are some common themes and overlaps that may be observed such as: body positivity, exploration of power dynamics, a sense of camaraderie, sexual expression, inclusivity, and acceptance. While there are certainly connections between the bear and kink scenes, it’s important to recognize that each community has its own unique culture, norms, and priorities. Some individuals may participate in both communities, while others may primarily identify with one or the other. Overall, the intersectionality between the bear and kink scenes offers opportunities for individuals to explore different aspects of their identities and find acceptance within diverse and supportive spaces.

BWM: Do you identify as a bear yourself? And what has your experience been in that community as a person of color?

Doug: I identify as a human… I’m kidding, of course I identify as a bear! There have been some evolutionary stages that brought me to that conclusion, mainly age and experience. It’s interesting that you ask about my experience as a bear of color, because for me I have always inserted myself into the spaces I wanted to belong to regardless of what others thought of me. I learned that if you want a seat at the table and you’re not welcomed, then build one yourself, and have everyone pull up a chair, because diversity, equity, inclusion, and accessibility ensures progress. I’m also not ignorant to the fact that there are bears of color who don’t feel seen, heard or even represented. As a community we have to be conscientious of who we are trying to represent, and bring down the barriers for those who want to be accepted. This is not an overnight process, and we need platforms such as Bear World Magazine to continue elevating the voices of marginalized groups, and create a culture where inclusive spaces are equitable for everyone.

BWM: Tell us what led to the Cell Block Chicago residency of Butch Please.

Doug: Cell Block Chicago only had us scheduled for three parties initially, but loved the energy, diversity, and inclusive environment that we provided, so they offered us a residency to continue the party quarterly. This was exciting as we wanted a party in Chicago to emphasize the rich culture of house music, and diversity. This partnership allowed us to bring house music to life at Cell Block Chicago by teaming up with talented DJs such as, Mister Hoochiemomma, Mar/Rio, Glanson, and Saint Mason.

BWM: Are there plans to further expand the party to other cities and venues?

Doug: We are excited to exclusively announce that we have created two additional parties under our brand WRUFF Events. We’re introducing a party called SQUEAL (a kink, fetish, leather pig party) at Jackhammer Chicago, Pride Fest weekend June 22nd, and an after-hours party called, SCOOCH, at Progress Bar in Chicago, produced by DJ Mister Hoochiemama, a week later during Pride in Chicago. In addition, we’ve collaborated with the ONYX Midwest Chapter to bring you Butch Please IML Weekend, Friday, May 24th at Cell Block Chicago, in conjunction with the ONYX Midwest Dance Party, Saturday, May 25th at Baseline Bar. You can also visit us in the following cities and locations:

  • Butch Please – Green Lantern, Washington, DC (next event March 8th)
  • Butch Please – SF Eagle, San Francisco, CA (next event March 15th)
  • Butch Please – Leather Stallion, Cleveland, OH

BWM: Tell us about the crowd that Butch Please attracts. What would you say to encourage someone who might be shy to come on down?

Doug: Our crowd is forever evolving, showcasing all sorts of identities—imagine us as the new generation of “Club Kids,” expressing ourselves in the most eclectic ways imaginable at Butch Please. We continue to elevate the diversity of all individuals providing them a safe space to feel comfortable in an environment that normally does not welcome them. Our parties continuously establish ground rules for respectful communication and behavior, and actively address instances of discrimination, harassment, exclusion, or non-consensual touching.

BWM: What issues do you think need to be addressed in the bear and kink scenes in order to foster a more inclusive environment?

Doug: The issues overall with the bear, kink, and leather scenes have a complex and multifaceted history, shaped by a diverse array of influences and experiences. There needs to be active listening to the experiences, concerns, and suggestions of marginalized individuals within the community. We need more platforms for these voices to be heard, whether through community forums, surveys, or dedicated listening sessions. We’ve learned that centering the perspectives of marginalized groups is essential for understanding the specific challenges we face. You can’t be performative—you have take the initiative to educate yourself and others about issues related to diversity, equity, inclusion, and accessibility. At the end of the day, it’s as simple as attending workshops, reading books/articles, and engaging in discussions on topics such as privilege, intersectionality, and allyship.

BWM: Is there anything we left out that you’d like to mention?

Doug: I urge other promoters to make a conscious effort to foster representation and visibility of marginalized groups within the bear, kink, fetish, and leather scenes. This involves featuring diverse models on marketing, and showcasing the contributions of underrepresented performers. In addition, take the time to solicit feedback from community members, track key metrics related to diversity, equity, inclusion and accessibility, and be willing to adapt your strategies based on their feedback.

Keep up with the latest from WRUFF Events

Website I Facebook I Instagram I Twitter

Latest Articles

BWM Staff

Our Staff Writing Team works hard to bring you great content and share news & events from the bear community and beyond.